Grander Finale at the Grand Tetons

The faux bandages

Well, I hadn't planned to make this post but here we go. To quote from one my favorite books of all time  "It was the best of times and it was the worst of times."  We started out of Idaho Falls on another crisp day with arm warmers and a sleeveless high tech undershirt (for warmth) beneath my favorite outfit. This is a very loud pink, black and white kit I bought in Civita Castallana, Italy when I was accompanying Charlotte on one of her painting trips. 

Idaho Falls in the center of town

The ride started with rolling hills alternating with flats and would ultimately cover 95 miles with two climbs, the second one, much more difficult than the first, and over the Grand Teton's Pass. The Pass dramatically came into view well before the climb. Even before we could see the Tetons, the the farms and the National Park were the most attractive landscapes we had encountered on the trip. Idaho has had record draught and everything is supposedly uncharacteristically brown. We have been following the Snake River to is origin and perhaps local  residents in this area are more aggressive with irrigation, given the verdant landscapes. When we hit the Park, the evergreen trees were large, plentiful and healthy. I told my riding mates Ainslee and  Big Charley, I felt we were looking at the most attractive area we would see on the entire trip. Like I said, "It was the best of times".


The first five miles of the second climb was close to the end of the ride and was only a 2-3 % grade. The scenery mitigated the slight discomfort of going up. The last three miles were at a 10 % grade and very difficult. Despite even better scenery, everything went to shit with a full two miles remaining. I felt I had good legs, but I was extraordinarily short of breath and very lightheaded. I had to get off the bike with the summit in sight.

Teton Pass

After a brief recuperation I made it to the Pass. At the top I caught my breath within a reasonable amount of time. The main problem there was the lightheaded feeling. I decided to stay for awhile and I let some of the riders I had been with and in front of throughout the day, go ahead. I drank some water and ate a cookie and in 20 minutes, was significantly better, but not at 100% . I headed down cautiously with riders immediately in front of me pulling away. The plan was to take it very cautiously and not attempt to catch anyone. Everything went as planned for 2 to3 miles, then I hit a steep straightaway. Since there was no turn I just relaxed and did not pay any attention to my speed. I am now labeling this moment as a "brief mental lapse". I noted I was going over 50 MPH so I touched my brakes softly. Shorty thereafter, the bike started to shimmy. I came off the saddle to squeeze the top tube with both legs which is the recommended maneuver for this problem. I was not successful and it is possible I did not totally clear my butt from the saddle or may have not given this strategy  enough time.


At that point I had 3 choices: (1) Continue to fight it and risk sailing across the center lane at the obvious approaching right hand bend 300 meters ahead and into oncoming traffic: (2) Pull off to the soft shoulder and likely hit the guard rail which I figured would launch me over to the cliff and never to be found; (3) Voluntarily lay the bike down and start rolling . I took a quick look in my rear view mirror to see if anyone was behind me, which would preclude option (3). Option (2), over the cliff is a good way for an old cyclist to go, but I am not that old. I never looked ahead again to confirm the turn in the road or to see if there was oncoming traffic. There was no one behind me so I immediately put the bike down on the right and started rolling clockwise around a head to toe axis, if you were looking at my head from the road shoulder, the direction my head was pointing. 


They say these type episodes always proceed in slow motion but my impression was definitely the opposite. I was spinning as fast as a cartoon character drilling his way into the ground. The distance before stopping was much more than I could have possible anticipated. Gravity with a 10% drop was providing quite the additional vector to the 50 plus MPH forward movement. I had plenty of time to think, and I was sure nothing too bad was going happen. I was confidant I owned that part of the road and there were no obstacles to hit or hit me. I knew I would eventually stop in plain site and given all the movement with all the colors I was wearing, this would have to attract the attention of an approaching vehicle, even one driven by an mountain watching geezer or a txting teenager.


The next vehicle stopped and someone called 911. My wallet came out my pocket and it was stuffed with twenty dollar bills (having been to the ATM for the second time in my life in Boise). The money was EVERYWHERE.  To diffuse the intense situation, (and do do greatly apologize for freaking everyone out) I announced that I knew how much money I had in there and I would count it in the ER).


I went to the ER and the medical details are boring. I gave them my medical insurance card and they handed it back saying it was a dental card. Before I handed them the correct card I told them that was all I had and couldn't they just say it was dental complication. After appropriate imaging I was told  I had a broken pelvis, not hip, and the pelvis was unstable. I do not have that much road rash because of little sliding, but I do have rather extensive mild to moderate bruising in a lot a places, from the bounces with the roll. Right now I am in the hospital with my wife Charlotte. I'm sitting in the chair and she is in the bed. I took 2 Tylenol yesterday morning an nothing for pain since. They ran a Diluadid drip for more than 24 hours which I needed then,but it was making me queasy and gave me a headache. Drug addict has been scratched from my Bucket List . As long as I'm still, I hurt a little in a lot of places. My brain must figure this is an error with the gain. No one, not even a fibromyalgia victim could hurt in this many places, so my brain has more or less shut down the painful input. If I make a wrong move I flash back to me in another life when I was a black woman delivering Wilt Chamberlain with a basketball in each hand


My friends from the Ride came by to see me the night they were here in Jackson Hole. They called to say they were coming and and the nurses helped me jerk their chain by letting me put on a total head and face bandage like the character in Catch 22 (Nurses come in chatting to each other and put the IV bottle where the bladder drainage bag was and vice versus) They came in and didn't say a word assuming I guess that I had total face road rash.


In the hospital I discovered an interesting fact that I want to report for the pathetic reason of assigning at least some blame beyond my control. My O2 saturation, normally 99% on room air at sea level was 83% here in the hospital at 6500 feet and the Pass is at 8431. The nurses say it is not unusual for us flatlanders to have a slight drop in their O2 saturation but not quite this much. I am speculating the extreme shortness of breath and  light headed feeling put me below my slightly above average ability to concentrate. I'll run it by the Pulmonary guys back home 


Tomorrow I will have surgery by a real nice Ortho guy who primarily rides a titanium Merlin. I'll have 2 fixation screws and supposedly will be able get around with out the flashbacks and fly home on Sunday to start the rest of my life. Further blog decisions to made then.

The real hospital scene. .Still able to drink good coffee Check
the Nespresso machine and Frother on my right

Hit below for link to ride and ignore max speed
http://connect.garmin.com/activity/195852543

P.S. I'm not that pissed, mostly happy to be alive